Guardrails Pt. 2

Swerve


PARENT SYNC:
Read Proverbs 13:20

Our students live in a world that is consistently pulling them away from what they know is right. Their friends and peers can often be the ones pulling them in those directions. We would all agree that it isn't good to only have "Christian" friends because we know it has a tendency to limit our child's worldview (and kind of moves them away from the Gospel). But as parents, we also know it's not good if our kids let their friends pull them the wrong direction.

And to add to that tension, we all have regrets from our past. And most of those regrets revolve around friendships, dating, and decisions that pulled us away from God.

This week, we determined that:

Our friends influence the quality and direction of our lives

Eventually, the people we spend time with with influence us. In Proverbs 13:20, we see that if we spend time with fools, we will become fools. If we spend time with the wise, we will become wise. So the real question becomes, "How do I help my child recognize foolish and wise choices... especially when it comes to friendships? Maybe the following discussion will help... I would suggest that with this topic, you use the 80/20 rule. You listen 80% of the time and only talk 20% of the time. Tell them, "I heard you talked about friends on Sunday. There was a phrase "our friends influence the quality and direction of your life"... what did you think of that talk this past Sunday?

Discuss the following...

• What is it that you like most about your friends?
• What worries you most about your friends?
• What are some guardrails you have made in regards to your friends?

Further Study: One of the best books I think every parent should read is "The Best Question Ever" by Andy Stanley. Over the next couple weeks, we are taking the High School group through the process of learning how to ask the best question ever ("What is the wise thing to do?")... but it would be good for us parents to read the book and begin to teach our kids to apply it when it comes to the decisions they are making in life. 

Guardrails Pt.1

SHIFT

A guardrail is designed to keep vehicles from straying into dangerous or off-limit areas. 

You set up a guardrail for your kids... you told them at one point or another not to put their finger into something that runs on electricity (like a light socket). Instead of explaining everything about electricity and how it works, we as parents made it simple... "Don't stick your finger in that!"

We have given our kids guardrails because we want to keep them from danger. We realize that our greatest regrets relationally, morally, spiritually, and practically (in life decisions) are a result of "crossing a line" that could have been avoided if we had a guardrail.

What we shared with the kids was a new perspective on "guardrails"... Guardrails are meant to give us freedom (not take it away). For instance, in High School group, we brought us that "sex before marriage" is intended to to keep us from losing our freedom. Not only does it limit us in the future in regards to intimacy with our future spouse, but the girl who got pregnant has less freedom... the guy who has to support the girl... the teen who has a STD... the couple who want to trust each other and get married but can't get past the other one's past... all of those are limits in freedom.

We didn't focus on just that topic, but here's the main idea: 

We are all just one decision away from doing irreversible damage to our lives and relationships (now and in the future). No one has ever regretted having a "guardrail". Not one person has ever regretted saving their first kiss for their wedding day. But plenty of people wish they had established guardrails.

PARENT SYNC:
Read Ephesians 5:15-17

Discuss the following...

• How do we know if something is right or wrong?
• How do we know if something is wise or foolish?
• What are some good guardrails we have as a family? Why are they good?

Further Study: One of the best books I think every parent should read is "The Best Question Ever" by Andy Stanley. Over the next couple weeks, we are taking the High School group through the process of learning how to ask the best question ever ("What is the wise thing to do?")... but it would be good for us parents to read the book and begin to teach our kids to apply it when it comes to the decisions they are making in life.